Matthew

Back to  the Taylor Swift groove. 

first there was Breven...

And then there was Matthew. the beginning of Junior year we met at a church dance, and then my dad played matchmaker and Matthew and I spent an entire day working at the vineyard together. and we would email, because he didn't have a cell phone. and i convinced my mom to drive all the way to Clovis to buy fruit and vegetables from the vegetable stand in his front yard. and then we out on a date with his little brother and a friend. We went to Red Robin and then ice skating (see #70 on my 100 list) and then he dropped me off at Mallorie's house, but Mal wasn't home yet, so he tried to teach me to dance. swing dance. in the middle of the street. at like midnight. it was great. 

Matthew's dad owns a magazine called "American vineyard" and Matthew wrote for it. I liked to pretend that I knew about farming to impress him.

Matthew tried to teach me to can jam. It was actually really fun, except that some of the boiling strawberries popped out onto my arm and burnt me really badly. still have the scar. His family is incredible. and Matthew is honestly one of the nicest people i know.

Matthew came to Madera a couple of times. once because he wanted me to cook him dinner. and i love making lasagna so it turned out alright. except that he likes to dance a lot. and so do i, but he can actually dance, and i can't. so i felt really dumb. but he tried dutifully to teach me to swing and salsa. 

We painted rocks. oh and did you notice that Matthew looks a lot like Breven?...Matthew is very kind, but i used him. rebound. and at the time i didn't see how leading someone on could be hurtful. now i do, and i'm really sad that i hurt such a good person, because Matthew is as honest and good as they come.

also, Jenae was in love with him, hard core.

Matthew played the piano and sang and was super spiritual and awesome, really. He was really supportive, and then he got his mission call to Tokyo Japan and i was very excited for him, but when he asked if i would wait for him, i got scared. because i realized that i had dug myself into a huge hole. I was rebounding, and he actually liked me. I was having fun and he was serious. i was 16, and he was ready to commit. 

I ended things roughly and rudely, mostly because i was 16 and irrational and didn't know how to handle the situation delicately or correctly. But because Matthew is so great, he was very gracious and still stayed my friend.

He's coming home from his mission soon, tomorrow i think... we wrote each other a letter while he was in Japan, and if i see him before I leave for Rexburg I'll be happy to give him a friendly hug and say hello, and maybe I'll awkwardly work in an "I really am sorry that I toyed with your feelings and led you on for five months just so that i could feel better about myself after i got out of an immature relationship... it was horrible of me and you deserved better.  I hope we can still be facebook friends?"

I hope he marries Jenae, they'd be a perfect fit. he really is a great guy, and he wants my dad's job, and Jenae wants a farmer husband, and Matthew is my dad's dream son in law, so he and Jenae would be perfect. that it, I'm setting it up.

anyway, there's Matthew. The great friend that i used.


and so you can judge me further, our unofficial song was "Over the rainbow" from the wizard of Oz, but the Glee version. because that's the first song we danced to.